"Because I Said So!" — An Ode to Old School Parenting and Why I’m Evolving

Because I Said SoJaune

0:00

Old School

Modern Parenting Tips

Alright folks, let’s talk about something that’s been gnawing at my brain like a toddler on a teething ring—old school parenting.

Now, growing up in the U.S. as a minority, my family’s approach to raising kids may not have looked exactly like the Brady Bunch. But whether you experienced it firsthand or heard whispers about it in school hallways, you probably know the vibe. Enter the Holy Trinity of Old School Parenting:

1. “Because I Said So” (a.k.a. the parental mic drop)

2. Talking Back (an Olympic-level offense)

3. Disrespect (also known as “Do you have a death wish?”)

   
   

These weren’t just rules—they were commandments, carved in stone and passed down like secret family recipes and plastic couch covers. And I’ll be honest—when my eldest starts “challenging” me, there’s a deep, ancestral urge to reach for that old-school “Because I Said So” like it’s the Excalibur of parenting wisdom.

But here’s the thing...

I’m Not Just Her Mom—I'm Her Google

I’m basically her Netflix docuseries in real-time. Her walking, talking, coffee-fueled encyclopedia of life knowledge. I’ve known her since she took her first breath, and let me tell you, she’s not trying to start a revolution—she’s just speaking her truth… or questioning my authority... 😕😊 Sure, sometimes that truth could use a thesaurus, a little tact, and maybe a dose of diplomacy, but hey, it's her truth.

And when she challenges me? Questions me? It’s not rebellion—it’s curiosity. It’s growth. And if I shut that down with a power move and a four-word sentence, what am I really teaching her? That she can’t come to me with anything? No, no. My job is to help her find the answers—and maybe give her a crash course in how to save her own life when she tries to talk to me in the future. 😅 For all those that follow these rules, here's how I replaced the commandments with a more conscious response.

Let’s Break Down the Commandments

So let’s unpack these sacred rules with a little honesty and a lot of humor. And before you go dusting off your “I’m Right, You’re Wrong” T-shirt, just hear me out.

This isn’t about bashing the way we were raised. It’s about making sure we’re not accidentally planting seeds of misunderstanding. Because once those seeds grow? Good luck pulling them out—it’s like trying to get glitter out of carpet. Or explaining dial-up internet to a kid born after 2010.

“Because I Said So”

It feels good. It ends the conversation. But does it teach anything? Maybe it's time to swap it out for “Let me explain why,” or even better—“What do you think?” (Brace yourself for their answer.)

Talking Back

Is it disrespect… or just a developing human trying to find their voice? Sure, tone matters, but so does encouraging them to speak up, ask questions, and think critically—even if it sometimes makes your eye twitch. My usual response? Humor. I’ll say, 'Jacki, for a second there, I thought about becoming a magician… and making you disappear.' After that little mood breaker, we get to the real talk—about how to assert her voice in a more respectful way next time.

Disrespect

Respect goes both ways. If we want it, we have to show it—even when we’re tired, frustrated, or knee-deep in sibling drama of Artsy moving Thomas the Train off the track.

Unbaking Cakes and Other Impossible Feats

Here’s what I’ve learned: it’s easier to teach a new lesson than to undo a bad one. You can’t unbake a cake. And you definitely can’t convince a teenager that you meant something different five years ago when you yelled, 'Because I said so!' over their fashion choices.

So instead of shutting them down, what if we leaned in? What if we tried to see the world through their eyes—even if their worldview currently revolves around black-and-white medical jargon, obsessively limiting energy usage, and an endless loop of 'But why?' questions?

We’re Raising Humans, Not Robots

Our job isn’t to program obedience—it’s to build resilience, curiosity, empathy, and yes, even wit. Because one day, these little humans will grow up. And maybe, just maybe, they’ll thank us for not always dropping the hammer.

Or at least they won’t write a tell-all memoir titled “Because I Said So: Childhood Trauma in Four Words.”

Have any old-school parenting commandments you’re still holding onto—or trying to let go of? Share them in the comments. Let’s evolve together—with a little grace, a lot of laughs, and maybe a few deep breaths. 💬👩‍👧‍👦

#ParentingEvolved #RespectAndCuriosity #ModernParenting #OldSchoolParenting #ParentingWithHumor #GrowthOverObedience #RespectfulParenting #BuildingEmpathy #ParentingJourney #RaisingCuriousKids